I remember I learned this word when I was in primary school. I believe it is still included in the vocal list for primary school students. The word is:
COLISEUM
Our government may better spend our tax money on replacing plates like this instead of spending them on making and hanging up banners for the ‘Anchors aweigh’ slogan:
「蘋果研發教育軟件 iLife 及 iWord, 用家可在電腦製作電影、音樂等作品。」（明報港聞）
微軟有Word, 蘋果有什麼？
答案是 iWork。 是Work 不是 Word!
這是資料上的錯。
然後，「蘋果研發教育軟件 iLife 及 iWord」這一句，是現在進行式的意思，即蘋果在研發這些軟件，還沒正式發行，但是，眾所周知，iLife和 iWork 都已經發行，而且都已經發行了兩代或以上。
這是文法上的錯。（當然，如果蘋果真的在研發一個叫做iWord的新軟件, 那就另作別類。）
再看「教育軟件」四字，iLife 和 iWork確實可用於教育用途，不過大概沒有人會把這兩個軟件，定位為教育軟件。事實上，原文的下一句即指：「蘋果教育副總監John Couch指出，軟件[可]應用於學習，提供平台予學生創作，適合21世紀結合科技的教育要求。」可應用於學習的軟件，與教育軟件是兩回事。很多軟件都可應用於學習／教育，溜覽器在教學時也有用到的，難道溜覽器也是教育軟件嗎？
這是語意上的錯誤。
一篇短短一百幾十字的報導，可以集齊資料、文法、語意的錯誤，明報新聞部搞什麼？
Sunday morning, went to church very early as I had to play the violin. Since I attended the first service (we have two in the same morning), so I went out to podium during the second service. A friend came over and asked if I can help out a bit. It turned out that there are French, a guy and a lady, at the reception table. My friend brought me over and they asked if I speak French. Well, my French is like… well, I was in advanced level but after not having used it for so many years, I don’t really remember much. The guy speaks English but the lady speaks French only. One of the elders was there trying to explain the situation but the communication was not that good. I told them I speak only a little and very bad but still tried to explain it to the lady that it seems there’s no French protestant church around. The guy speaks English but he has to work on most Sundays and so he can’t stay with her in our church. I told them that there’re a couple other in the church who speak fluent French but we have to ask if they’d be willing to do whisper interpretation for her during service. And I asked her to leave her contacts so that we may contact her after we’ve made the arrangements. Then they left.
As they were leaving, the guy said to me that I said I could only speak little French but that little got more and more…It’s not a little, he said. Oh… it was like speaking tongue, haha!
It’s actually rare to find a French being Christian… non Catholic Christian. French people… most of them claim themselves to be Catholics but most of them only go to church on big days: Christmas, Easter, Wedding, and Funeral. I hope we can help that French lady to settle down in our church so that she can get more support.
I was a bit surprised that I still remember how a lot of my French. Never thought I’d have the chance to use it again…in Hong Kong but who knows…
有一天跟朋友J在尖沙咀逛街, 經過一間專賣Snoopy的店鋪, J十分高興, 本來說要回家的, 也把我拉進店內, 終於讓她看中了一個Snoopy托盤, 是最後一個, 她便快快的買下來. 問題是:當天晚上她要看芭蕾劇, 當時已不夠時間讓她回家把東西放下, 若把托盤帶走, 實在不方便. 於是, 我們問看店的小姐能否先付錢, 下星期再到店裡取回. 那看店小姐想了想, 說「也可以」, 於是便取紙筆, 要寫下J的姓名, 方便到時認人. 必須先聲明, 看店小姐的廣東話是十分標準的, 看樣子少於二十歲, 青春可人.
「小姐, 請問你姓甚麼?」
「姓廖」
「…不好意思, 我不懂怎樣寫, 可以請你寫嗎?」
「…也可以」
「謝謝, 這樣就可以了」
「誒…你是不是應該給我一張單據比較好? 否則到時你怎知道是誰來拿?」
「噢, 也對喔!…(拿出單據簿)…你買的那個叫甚麼, 我不懂怎樣寫呢!」
「那是個Tray…托盤吧!」
「托盤…但我不懂得寫啊!」
「還是我來吧!」
「呀! 請你寫上你的姓呀! 我不懂.」
「你要寫明我是已付錢但未取貨物吧! 要不然怎麼知道我是取了還是未取呢?就寫已付未取吧!」
「未…噢, 取字怎麼寫呀?」
「…(臉上掛滿黑線, 頭頂冒煙)耳字旁, 加上一個又!」
我左看右看, 看不到她已寫了「已付」, 問朋友, 朋友把單揚了揚, 呵! 寫了…
「比左$」!
我很好奇, 下星期再去那店的時候, 那小姐會不會看著單據跟我們說:「誒…寫了甚麼?我看不懂呀!」
朋友F的老闆是個美國人, 來香港開設分公司不久, 對廣東話可有興趣得很, 不時留心聽下屬間的對話, 從中學得不少’片言隻語’.
每天中午, 他都聽到下屬們說’ 食晏啦!’, 於是他很聰明的了解這是去吃午飯的意思, 但他很想知道其實這兩個字本身是甚麼意思的, 一問之下, 一惑不解:
‘Why? How can you eat the afternoon?’
嗯, 好問題. 正如我不明白, 為甚麼人家上台表濱, 你跟人說’Break a leg!’
又一次, 他們到一間餐廳吃飯, 剛好那餐廳之前停電, 朋友與同事便說: ‘啊! 頭先Cut 電.’ 然後老闆又大惑不解:
‘I know 電 is electricity but how can electricity cough? How can they be related?’
‘Oh, that ‘cut’ is not Cantonese. It’s C-U-T ‘cut’, English.’
‘Oh, I see. But how do you cut electricity? You mean they cut the wire with a pair of scissors?’
‘Hmm…well, ‘cut’ means ‘disconnect’ here…’
又上了一課, 原來cut與electricity是不可以一起用的, 大家要記得.
聽完後, 我跟朋友F說了有關姨丈教書的趣事:
姨丈是在成績不太好(應說很差吧!)的中學教理科的, 亦即是說他教的都是高年級學生, 而該校的高年級都是用英語授課的. 一天姨丈跟其中一個學生說: ‘你lunch黎見我.’ 那學生反問: “咩黎見你話?’ 姨丈重覆了一次: ‘Lunch 黎見我呀!’ ‘咩lunch呀?’
姨丈深感無力, 再說了一次, 不過今次有點不同, 他是這樣說的:
‘Lun廚黎見我呀’
‘哦, Lun廚去見你呀, 得啦!’
不知道如果下次朋友跟同事說: ‘食lun廚啦!’ 她的老闆會有甚麼反應呢?
